Head of the World – Year 4 Poetry

He was the World.

His nose was like an enormous, ice-tipped mountain.

His forehead was a mighty river flowing across his brow.

His eyes were like deep canyons; colossal gouges chiselled from his rocky face.

His tears were waterfalls cascading down his grassy cheeks.

He was the World.

Can you continue the poem? Can you think of come of your own similes and metaphors to use?

24 Comments

  1. His forehead was like littered town houses.
    the clouds swirled around his head like a crown
    his nose was cold snowy mountain

    • Well done Sophia! Try to add commas in between your adjectives and start sentences with a capital.
      Make sure you write your final line too πŸ™‚

  2. His forehead was filled with azure water,
    His noes was covered in frost white snow,
    His cheeks were covered in emerald moss,
    He was the world- Proud strong and interesting

    • Fabulous use of noun phrases Maci! Can you add commas between adjectives and perhaps include a simile. πŸ™‚

  3. He was the universe
    His forehead was a deep, blue ocean circling underneath his crown of clouds.
    His eyes were dark, black caves, sunken deep into his face.
    His nose was like a colossal snowy cliff surrounded by his grassy cheeks.
    Crocodile like skin, scaled around his magical face.
    He was the universe – powerful, dark, mysterious!

    • Wow Archie! What a poem – descriptive and engaging!
      You have successfully used noun phrases, similes and metaphors. A triumph πŸ™‚

      Perhaps you could have a go at the challenge if you have time today. I’d love to hear what you think the other side of his head would be like! Well done Archie.

  4. His forehead was sprinkled with cities and towns, from the sapphire water it looked like toys.
    Clouds spiralled around the mighty head as gentle as the sway of a leaf.
    His eyes were closed, shut tight as he was in his deep slumber.
    Tears that cascaded to the bottom of the moss.
    He was the world- powerful and chaotic.

  5. He was the World.
    His eyebrows were like luscious green bushes.
    The glistening river was a silk gown flowing across his forehead.
    His hair was a ring of clouds.
    The clustered houses on his forehead stood side-by-side like children in a playground.
    The clouds on his nose were a moustache,
    The twisted branches were like an army invading every inch of his face.
    His mouth was like a deep, dark cave.
    He was the world.

    • Wow Shaun! Beautifully written. This has made myself and Mrs Kidger smile. Wonderful use of similes. Keep up your hard work πŸ™‚

    • Hi Tilly,
      lovely use of simile and metaphor πŸ™‚
      Make sure you conclude your poem with a 4th line too – perhaps a list of three adjective like we did in class.

  6. His forehead was water and boat with little beach.
    His nose look like a triangle snow.
    I see a little stick on his eyebrow.
    The picture look like a man Face.

    • Hi Lily,
      Well done a lovely poem with similes.
      Top tip – end by saying ‘The picture looks like’ rather than ‘look like’. You could even say ‘the man’s face’ too πŸ™‚

  7. He had clouds running in circles all around him like fluffy cotton candy.
    On his forehead he had water that was as blue as a glittering diamond.
    In his eyes and mouth he had lava as red as a rose.
    On his nose he had snow as cold as a snow flake.

    • Hi Maia,
      Well done for posting your poem. I can see that you’ve worked incredibly hard to present it in verse form and use clear capital letters and full stops. You’ve used some wonderful similes here – crafting wonderful descriptions for the reader. It sounds like you enjoyed writing this poem Maia – and I loved reading it. I’m so proud πŸ™‚

  8. Looking deep into the universe,
    is an infinite cosmic land.
    Earth is where we are.
    All is in motion,
    growing as bounteous and beautiful to live in.
    The blue and aquatic ocean,
    is magical and ginormous.
    At the bottom of the earth,
    is as cold as rocky and ebony space.
    This is the fantastic existence of the world.

    • Good morning Dwayne,
      I love how you have been creative about your poem’s structure here! Well done! I can spot some wonderful adjectives too – bounteous and infinite are my favourite.
      Top tip – next time try to include a simile too πŸ™‚

  9. Around the solar system
    His nose was tipped of ice
    Clouds swirling around him like a crown
    He cried water falls that trickled down his stone eyes
    He was the world

    • Hi Finley,
      What a wonderful poem. I like your use of similes here and the line ‘he cried waterfalls’. Beautiful! Well done! πŸ™‚

  10. His forehead was soft and cold like ice cream,
    His nose was like glistening snow getting eaten,
    His mouth crumbled from the destruction he ate,
    he was the world! Peaceful, happy and exhausted.

    • Beautiful! Carefully chosen words and wonderful use of similes!
      Top Tip – start each and every line with a capital in a poem πŸ™‚

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